seafoam noises

 i feel quite

      ~!*%[€__*[+silly!&11&19-99

i don’t quite know why

  but i would like to know

sometimes i feel silly and i can’t understand why. sometimes i can’t understand many things. i panic sometimes randomly but i don’t know. it’s not because of worry; but more of shame?

i don’t know

i just feel all silly inside and i want my body to work but it says no. i wanna curl up with a cherry x dr pepper icee and be in comfy, soft, plaid pajama pants. i want to watch bluey on my laptop, not on a tv, because it feels more personal. like i am the one seeing it. i don’t know why this makes me happy. it calms me down. i had a good childhood and i’m grateful for my family but i still never felt like a kid. sometimes i just wanna jump into the ocean and float. turn into seafoam.